LTUE Report: Medieval Weapons 101

    Hi!

    No, I haven't dropped off the face of the earth, I promise. :) I have, however, been taking an English 2010 class this semester, and as a result I've used most of my writing brain cells working on boring, academic papers instead of interesting blog posts and stories. Let's just say that my writing productivity overall has dropped a lot, and it's taken me a while to figure out what to say around here.

    This is the first post in a series that I'll refer to as the LTUE Report--or, in other words, a bunch of blog posts about what I learned at LTUE 42 this year. To start, I want to talk about Medieval weapons, because that was probably my favorite presentation of the entire symposium. The presentation itself was called "Medieval Weapons 101", and it was done by C. David Belt (just to make sure I attribute my sources like my English professor would want).

    First, I don't have a lot of specific notes in my notebook about what I learned. I have some, of course, but most of it is pretty experiential, and I'm reporting less on the information presented and the stories told than on what I learned by handling a bunch of real, sharpened Medieval weapons.

    However, I do feel a need to provide the same warning Mr. Belt did. While Medieval weapons are not as efficient or as easily lethal as modern firearms, and while they are super cool and nifty, they are still dangerous weapons! They are just as casually dangerous as a pistol--maybe even more so. When you've got a well-balanced sword in your hands, the temptation to swing that baby around and try it out is strong.

    The precautions Mr. Belt took to ensure our safety were a lot of strict warnings and letting us know that every blade was sharp and battle-ready; in his words (paraphrased), "You'll be less likely to fool around and get someone hurt if you know that thing in your hand can kill. If it's blunt, you'll be more tempted to swing it around because you don't think it's dangerous, but bluntness doesn't mean safety. Best to keep it sharp and encourage respect of the weapon in your hands."

    If you ever have the chance to hold a real sword, be careful with it! Sharp or not, it's a heavy piece of metal with an edge, and even if that edge is blunt it can still break the skin. Don't fool around. Don't think that just because this is a replica of a Dark Ages relic, it's somehow not dangerous. Medieval weapons were designed the way they were for very good reason, and as Mr. Belt said, bad weapons didn't last much longer than 50 years because they didn't work. Swords, spears, axes, and so on are so easy to hurt people with--and that's the point! If it didn't work, it wouldn't have been used.

    Another way to put it? "Do not point the weapons at anyone you do not intend to kill; if you do intend to kill, be swift and accurate so the blade doesn't rust." (That last bit is because the liquids and oils that come out of the human body aren't very kind to steel, so you want to get it off as quickly as you reasonably can. Because of this, Mr. Belt was also very strict that we don't touch the blades. He openly said that he cared more for his steel than he did for our fingers.)

    You got the memo?

    I know this might seem a bit extreme, but I watched a video just today that hammered the point home even better than Mr. Belt's warnings did. Here's a link to it if you're interested. Please be careful with weapons of any kind, because they are intended to cause bodily harm and will do so more easily than you might think.

    Now, some myths to bust.

    You may have heard this one busted a lot, and that is the idea that swords are super heavy.

    Allow me to expand your knowledge.

    Swords are not 20-30 pounds. But that doesn't mean they're light. Remember, this is still a bar of metal ranging between two and six feet long, depending on the type of sword. Different metals, such as copper or bronze, are heavier than other metals, such as iron or steel. But even a fairly standard-size steel longsword is not light. It's just... not unwieldably heavy. I think the heaviest sword I held during the presentation was a greatsword, which was, I think, about five feet long--maybe a bit more. If I had to guess, it wasn't heavier than seven or eight pounds.

    However, it still felt extremely heavy. Eight pounds doesn't seem like a whole lot, but when it's stretched out over a five-foot steel bar that you swing around, it's going to start feeling like a lot really, really fast. The longswords ranged from, I would guess, 3-5 pounds, depending on the quality of the longsword, and even there I felt pretty certain that I'd have trouble using it with most of the longswords. I think there was one that I felt pretty certain I'd be able to swing a few times, but of course I didn't get a chance to try because, y'know, sharp blade in a full convention room.

    (One small caveat--I am an Irish dancer, and if you've seen any videos of my dance form, you'll know that we don't use our arms very much. Swordsfolk use their arms a whole lot more, so I'm kind of a wimp in that department.)

    So swords aren't very heavy, but to the uninitiated and inexperienced, they're going to feel very heavy.

    Myth #2: Big swords are gigantic.

    This is another one where I can say, "Yes, they're big--but they're not that big."

    Most of the size of a large sword comes in length. The blades aren't very thick or wide, just long, and that makes a difference. It would be impossible to wield some of the huge, chunky giant-swords you see in video games like Legend of Zelda or Warhammer. That would be like trying to swing an extremely long steel ingot around instead of a blade. Besides, as far as anyone can tell, those things are so thick that they wouldn't even have a decent edge.

    Big swords are big, and they are heavy, but again, they're not unwieldable. You'd definitely have to be a pretty big person to use one effectively, though. Please don't give your tiny fantasy characters enormous swords unless you want them to be utilizing the inertia of the sword to swing them around the battlefield--and even that is a bit of an iffy technique, as far as my research has indicated.

    Myth #3: An eleven-year-old could wield a bronze sword.

    Have you ever read the Percy Jackson series(es)? If you have, do you remember how Percy gets a three-foot-long Celestial Bronze sword at the beginning of the first book?

    Not realistic. So not realistic.

    This is one that Mr. Belt addressed directly during the presentation, and he backed up his claims by passing around real copper and bronze swords.

    The copper sword was maybe a foot long from the pommel to the tip. The bronze sword was slightly longer. Both were dang heavy! There is no way I could have used one of those things, let alone an eleven-year-old boy who hasn't quite hit puberty or developed his full strength yet. Extending the length to three feet would make it fully impossible, and for more reasons than just the weight.

    Copper is soft; it bends easily and doesn't hold a great edge. Bronze is brittle and liable to snap under too much stress. Either is going to be a disaster if it's too long, and three feet is definitely too long. Even if your eleven-year-old demigod is somehow superhumanly strong, that three-foot bronze blade isn't going to work, because the moment it hits something too hard, it's going to want to crack, snap, or shatter. Let's not even bother touching on the disaster that would be Imperial gold from the second series.

    Myth #4: Weapons can cut through any kind of armor.

    This is, I think, a mistake that fantasy movies make more often than fantasy books do. Imagine you're Aragorn from The Lord of the Rings, swinging your longsword around at heavily-armored orcs and Uruk-hai. Somehow, you've got to get through their armor--but there's no need for finesse. Of course not! You can just bash your little three-pound longsword against their plate armor and it'll cleave right through, no problem.

    Yeah, no. Again, Medieval people weren't dumb. They did stuff for good reason, and armor is one of those things that they wouldn't have used if it didn't do something helpful. If you're fighting someone in plate armor with a longsword, you're probably screwed unless you can finesse your sword through a gap in their armor, pierce through the maille that's probably keeping that gap safe (looking at you, armpits), and still have enough power behind your blow to seriously injure them. Personally, I'd rather use a poleaxe, a bec de corbin, or a war hammer for that task.

    Armor works, and there are very real concerns a warrior is going to have to consider if they know they're going into a fight with someone armored. Even the type of armor is going to change what they choose.

    Maille? Better get something that can force the rings apart, like a stiletto (for really close range), a bodkin-point arrow (for really long range), or some kind of stiff stabbing sword or fine-pointed spear. Otherwise, blunt-trauma weapons like maces or war hammers should do fine, because blunt trauma transfers through the floppy maille--but slicing weapons aren't going to do the job because they don't get through the rings.

    With a gambeson, slicing becomes a lot more important, and having your weapon razor sharp is going to help you get through the layers of cloth a gambeson is made of. In this case, I'd use a spear or a really sharp, slicey sword, such as a saber (just keep in mind that sabers aren't necessarily better at cutting than other swords; rather, they're better at not getting lodged in bones and other hard things--or so I've heard).

    With plate armor, I want something that can apply a lot of blunt force to a small area and/or punch through the plate. Bodkin arrows can apparently do this, but if you're not an archer and you have to fight at close range, I recommend something with a hammer head and a spike, at the very least. Hence, my earlier reference to poleaxes, bec de corbins, and war hammers. (If you look up pictures of historical versions of these weapons, please notice, too, how small the hammer and axe heads on these actually are. Putting a massive hammer head on the end of a long pole is just going to make it impossible for you to use the thing. In general, the longer the stick, the smaller the hammer/axe head.)

    Scale armor, brigandine, laminar, and lamellar are four other kinds of armor; I recommend you do your own research if you want to use one of these in your story because I don't have the space in this blog post. There's already a ton of information on these out there; go dig it up yourself. :)

    If you want some good resources for further research on these topics, my go-to YouTube channels for historical weapons and armor are Shadiversity, Skallagrim, Scholagladiatoria, and Metatron. I recommend ignoring most of the Internet drama that surrounds these creators, because I care more about the information than I do about the politics. Also keep in mind that Metatron is a historian and as such does a lot more than just weapons and armor.

    Myth #5: Primitive weapons suck.

    Have you ever heard of the macuahuitl? I'm not including pictures in this post, so Google it right now if you've never seen a picture of this kind of sword before. (Heck, even if you have seen a picture before, Google it so you can reference back to it as I talk.)

    Okay, now that you've done that, let's move on.

    When you looked at that picture, what did you see?

    Personally, I would describe a macuahuitl as a skinny wooden paddle with pieces of rock stuck into the sides. In its most basic form, that is really all it is.

    However, macuahuitls are extremely dangerous, even more so than the average steel sword. Where Mr. Belt's assistants could handle the metal swords relatively comfortably with their protective leather gloves on, they had to be extra careful with the macuahuitl because it cut through the gloves like there was nothing there at all.

    See, those rocks stuck into the edges of the paddle are knapped obsidian, which is so sharp that some surgical knives are made with thin flakes of it because it can cut on a sub-cellular level, making it extremely precise. With a real, battle-ready macuahuitl, you could probably brush the edge of one of those stones and end up with a deep slice in your finger.

    Macuahuitls are so effective that there are stories of people cutting off the heads of horses in a single strike with them. Because they're made of cheap, accessible materials, you don't even have to worry if you lose one of your obsidian shards or break the paddle, since it's so easy to fix or replace--which means no pulling punches.

    As a side note, arrows, spears, and axes with obsidian points and blades are going to be just as sharp and dangerous.

    Primitive weapons may not be durable, but in many ways they don't have to be. They're light and cheap, and I don't imagine that it would be much of a problem to carry a spare weapon into battle if you were really worried your sword would break.

    To be completely honest, I was more nervous about holding Mr. Belt's macuahuitl than I was with any of the other weapons, even the ridiculously heavy bar mace or some of the heavier single-handed swords that were tough to pass from person to person securely because the handles were too short to fit three or four hands. That thing is so casually dangerous, even in comparison to all the other casually dangerous things I handled that day.

    If someone ever came at me with a macuahuitl, I'd run. I wouldn't even try to fight back, because something that can cut through a horse's neck definitely has the capacity to cut me in half.

    So, no. Primitive does not mean inferior.

    That's all for today. I do have more information tucked away in my brain about different kinds of weapons, how they're used, and so on, despite my complete lack of personal experience (I've done a lot of reading and video-watching), so if you want me to talk about this more, or recommend more resources on weapons, let me know in the comments.

    If, on the other hand, I've freaked you out with my excitement about deadly historical objects, tell me to shut up about it and I will. Probably. :)